simple is a blissful life:X

Disappointment

Busy bees! Hoo hoo.. What a day! Keep running with two jobs, just got to rest my soul on my cosy bed! I finally receive your SMS. I’m very elated to see this number that I didn’t save in my phone. I thought that you will call me out for tea or others, but you ask me for my account number! I started to cry, this is the immediate feeling that I have! So hush that my heart was broken into thousand pieces! I replied after my last tear. I told myself that I must be strong to my decision! Go for what I think I should do, I meant to have a broken family, a broken friendship and a broken heart! I’m not showing off anything, or need anyone to pity me. I just want to shout out my feelings. All are hypocrites, the darkness that you will not know or even experience, so how can you be in my shoes? No stand, no views, no results! Even my parents don’t care, why should you care, just leave me alone! I started to hate you! Prove me wrong!

A brand new day…

Not going to fb or even tumblr for months, not posting any freak topic for years. This is the life that i want to go? I just couldn’t stop thinking of the life that I want.  Thanks to the car who almost bang on me, I really love your car. Seriously, after you horn on me, my flashes of memories came back, I thought that I’m leaving in this world, but I’m not. The moment of silent makes me want to get back to this world, penny of thoughts, thanks driver for giving me sufficient time to react.  

I have make my decision last night, could want to voice out to my sisters. When I msn one, another by calling, no one reply me and i think there’s something wrong with them. I have no thoughts of it, and execute with what I’m planning.

Firstly, I will move out of my house and find a place to stay. This is to make me more stress free from home. There’s too much affairs that had been on my mind, must not affect my studies. It’s my last year of academic, I just wish I could finish up and go to the working society and work. Sometimes, I don’t even know what I should do, or where should I headed to. Most of the times, I went out for shopping, all the stuff that I brought is not for me, is for my family. So, it’s time that i must be self centred and be fair to myself.

Secondly, I will try to finish up my education. Seriously speaking, I feel like withdrawing, but it’s a diploma certificate that I want since secondary school. Please don’t stop me from getting it! Although I can’t get into the course that I want, at least I strive for the best for what I had planned!

Thirdly, if possible, I will not find any of my friends. I feel like I’m a nuisance, keep on find friends whenever I’m in doubts. I mean I’m like a ghost to them, who only believe to be found when they’re free and can’t be found when they’re not free. Do you know that how serious I am in this friendship? 101% serious! Time will prove the rest of the seriousness and stuff.

·         They refers to me:D

Lastly, quit all the bad habits that I learned since of my age of 16. Gosh, it’s been years that I drink? Stop drinking, it’s been ruining your gastric. Smoking? Nah, just for fun, can’t you see my white teeth. Maybe it’s time to let go, no more clubbing, no more pubs, no more k-box, no more movies, no more holidays, what’s more? I can’t think of it, it’s demonising my brain cells.

Remember this, just believe yourself in no matter where you are, cause I will be the one who is supporting me! Just joking, I still have my uni mates, Kelly! My sisters, huan ling, siew lan, shu juan, hui ping, anqi and even fangli. My besties yy, laila, alvin, zhi lin. My dearest cousin Wendy.

That’s mushy, the end of my planning. Oyea, don’t need  to even bother to call me, as my line will be cut by singtel soon. Live without a phone and internet with the fullest! Good bye guys:D

Holidays is not refering to rocks…

Holidays!! Peace and harmony (Y). My wish is granted and here I’m going to complete my task. All my worries and stress will end by now, because I know that I could put down my burden. Now, my task is to concentrate in my holiday work, and celebrate my friends 21st birthday. This might be the last outing of all, as all of us will be duper busy with our work and school stuffs. I’m not trying to be pessimistic, is to be realistic. I don’t like feuds and shouldn’t touch what-ever relationship they want to be. I’m just tired of their games, should have walk out of this circle and live on to my useless life. Cried without tears, lies without blinking her eyes, I will promise her that I will live well, better than her. I doubt I will not forgive your returns, cause another came back!

Thursday night, went out with KT, JH, Alvin, Hui Aun, Wilson, Howsiang and Edel for a drink. The drink was so a good one, because it’s been a long time I drink with this cliques. End up, my gastric started to pain again. I thought I have recovered since the last time I went clubbing. Too much alcohol makes me suffer. Really, I can’t go drink or even club; I need to save myself out of this. Occasionally, I love to go out with the guys (cliques) who can accompany me drink, and play the fun games. I love their presences, should go out and drink often!! Don’t care about the gastric, just die with it.

Holidays for me to charge, and for me to think of my future, let’s make this holiday a good and fruitful one!

Divorcing.. Worthless relationship!

Study week is for peeps like us to revise for our dude semester revision! Well for me, one and only exam paper falls on Monday! Envy through! Just kidding, freaks thee.. Trying hard to score the maximum marks! Mr jack told us, how we can be better than others? Well, it’s to study hard, and shines in the study industry! I think it’s quite impossible, reason is always English! All of us pass through o levels, but for me? Just a D7 for English, and I gonna to fight among with the elites in my pool of classmates? Just couldn’t imagine how breathless I am during the run? I thought I’m having some kind of weird illness. Alright let’s stop us here! Parents are divorcing and I’m not going to any of their lawyer meetings and stuffs! It sucks, I don’t really likes it! This is their own business, Im gist stranger walking pass. I just couldn’t bare, but we had to let go on life! I believe there’s friends out there experience this kind of poppy situation before. So I got to be strong! Alright! Time to end to tumblr meeting! Good night, noon is here to catch me:(

I hate this moment of time..

Today, I read a newspaper article about a car run down accident. I was feeling down and angry. Why can’t the car driver be more meticulous and stuff? I hate that!

I missed Eugene. It’s been months and time flies, without his presences for long isn’t easy and great. I have noone to talk and throw out my feelings to. I try to be stress-free, but I can’t. How I wish I can throw out my feelings to someone who I think he/she won’t feel I’m an idoit.. Just like elephants do.

Anqi and Hui ping’s birthday is coming, I wish I could have organize everything well and in order! Just like anybody says, I’m always good in organizing outings. Like real! Haha..

Someone asked me a question: “My birthday wishes for this year?” Woo, can I be more greedy this year? Well, I hope that all my sisters will be attached to a guy, especially Jan. You know why? Cause Jan is the person who I worried about. Exactly, too much taiwan dramas! There’s the only way out for her. I can exchange my love life to give them and better love line. Yes, I’m serious. No kidding. I hate relationship stuffs, and whenever I can help to patch a couples, I do help quite a lot. Yea.. Those who had been patched by me, you guys should give me a big ang bao when ROM ar.. Haha.. Well, I’m quite independent such a way, so don’t look down on me, or you will get it from me!

This year valentines day, I had celebrate with my sisters and had a great day with them. (Although I’m sicked). Yea.. No present from anyone. Sad right! Aiya, thought of buying a coach purse for myself. Haha. Or Long champ bag? Well, maybe wait for sales or something? Haha. Time to do my EPM assignments, stop dreaming.